Grace. Gracious. Grace-filled. Graceful.
When I have pictured people, who are graceful or grace-filled, I have pictured very mild mannered, quiet…you know…the even-tempered type. That is not me.
I like to call aspects of my personality “passionate”. It makes me feel better. I speak with a lot of passion, I respond concerning injustices, whether large or small, passionately, I parent passionately and I love my family and my friends with a deep passion.
Here’s a perfect example of how I might respond with this “passion.” I was walking through the snow a few years back and stepped into some dog poop that belonged to my neighbor’s dog.
(Quick disclaimer: We don’t own animals, it basically boils down to the fact that they don’t wear pants. I would never allow a human to sit on my couch without pants, therefore, I don’t allow animals to either. Can I snuggle up to other people’s pets? Absolutely! I enjoy loving on animals! I just can’t witness a BM and then completely erase it from my mind.)
Minutes later I found myself “passionately” heaving frozen poop with a shovel into my neighbor’s yard.
I’m sure that was a sight.
That was a moment where I reacted with grace-less pursuit of passion. It’s embarrassing to think back, plus my arms were sore for several days after. I must lift my arms often because it became a literal painful reminder of how poorly I had responded.
I saw a quote on social media that had me thinking more about what it is to live a grace-filled life. The quote was the opposite, it was more of a “what you should do to be a better person,” or an undercover way of the person posting to reflect what they need in their relationships. But as I read it, I didn’t feel grace. I felt condemnation, worry and fear. I felt an inadequacy, even though I knew it wasn’t a personal attack, I was reminded how impactful my words and actions can be.
The self-help books and quotes…they are everywhere. On a weekly basis I tell my husband that I know my faults, they are glaring directly at me every time I look in the mirror BUT my hope is that as every year passes, little pieces will develop and grow, I know I will never amount to the Janna that was created for Heaven, but I will do my best with the heaven-on-earth Janna version.
Grace is the covering that floods our earthly being as we try to navigate life.
Grace allows people to mess up over and over unintentionally, because we know their hearts and they know ours.
Grace is the moment we choose to put our own preferences, needs and wants aside, which is not natural for me (I mean I LOVE me, I think I’m great…at being naturally selfish), instead, we put them all aside to better understand someone else.
Jesus’ entire life was centered around grace. His life and death are an example of what grace looks like at its fullest. Grace is saying, we are different and instead of pushing what I want upon you, I want to know you better, I want to love you better, I want to lay my selfishness down, and to the best of my ability, love with a grace-filled heart.
Don’t be the angry Janna that was hauling frozen poop into her neighbor’s yard on a freezing winter day. Be a neighbor that would choose to get to know their neighbor. To understand their struggles and hardships and to learn to love them throughout it all.
That is grace.
I am so thankful for grace. I need it every second of every day.